INTERVIEW #14: FEATURING TAYRIN TAPIA
There are some people who make you braver. Leaders do that, their abilities aren’t really about what they do- it’s what they inspire others to do. That’s the most important part, and Ms. Tayrin Tapia is one such Boriqua leader. The first leaders of Borinquen (known as Puerto Rico) were called Caciques or Cacica if female leaders. In the time of the Taino (A direct translation of the word “Taíno” signified “men of the good and noble”), Chiefs were chosen from the Nitaínos and generally obtained their power from the maternal line. Our maternal ancestors, literally our ancient mothers, were revered. Yet, when the Spaniards came, Tainos became victims to sexual violence, rape, family separation, slavery, and developed sickness and diseases, introduced by the Europeans, killing our Indigenous people, making them extinct, according to many. Survivors of the genocide? Erased on paper… The 1787 census in Puerto Rico lists 2,300 pure “Indians” in the population, but on the next census, in 1802, not a single “Indian” is listed”, as historians and advocates point out. Meet Tayrin Tapia: Tayrin’s ancestors were Tainos, and they survived! They went on to have a descendant that would speak truth to power, speak to the legacy of sexual violence in our community. A mother, a businesswoman, an organizer, and an advocate. Most importantly, the first Puerto Rican woman I have ever met in my entire life that addressed an audience, talking about her personal life experience of sexual assault and exploitation. Sin venguenza (without shame), it’s often used as a negative term in our dialect, but here it’s the appropriate term in a fairway. Tayrin breaks barriers. She speaks about past roadblocks where our male-dominated culture lies in front of us. She speaks without shame for herself and others who remain quiet. She speaks with the strength that comes from being unafraid; she changes the world for many. I know, she changed my life, in one of the profound ways, simply by being unafraid. She started the first and to my knowledge, only organization created by a survivor of sexual assault this Latino community has ever experienced. She named it Dear Tayrin, putting her name on it, literally. For that reason, she inspired me to advocate on behalf of human trafficking survivors. Right before I stand up every time to speak about human trafficking to community groups or talk about it in a meeting setting, Tayrin stands up with me in mind, and this is every time. THE INTERVIEW Let her speak for herself. Read the following interview, and learn about a woman who speaks truth to power: What values were taught in your home? I was taught that faith, family, and community are at the top of our values list. I was taught that being an independent woman is okay and that it means you have strength. . I was taught that being independent doesn’t mean you don’t need a partner but that instead, it means you can stand on your own two feet, but if a special person comes into your life to help you stand, achieve goals and dreams, well then that is a bonus. Where were you born? I was born in Santurce, Puerto Rico, moved to the Bronx, NY, at the age of 5, and then moved to Buffalo, NY at the age of 13. Even though I have moved out of Buffalo several times since then, I call Buffalo home. What motivated you to become an advocate? My own story as a survivor of child sexual abuse; it motivated me to become an advocate for other victims of sexual abuse, now survivors. I wanted to be a voice for those who felt voiceless. I am also an advocate in bringing awareness to HIV/AIDS. I became passionate to be an advocate in this field due to my work at Evergreen Health Services. It really helped me open my eyes to the stigma surrounding this tabooed subject and I wanted to also be a means of support. I am also an advocate for our youth, focused on youth development and promoting positive mindsets. What about your child’s experience, did that make you want to speak up? During seventh grade, I had a conversation with a friend who had experienced sexual abuse. When I left school that day, I told my then-stepmom about it and eventually said “hey, me too.” To my surprise, she had no clue which led me to believe, either my dad never told her because he didn’t want to, or he didn’t tell her because he didn’t know. That night I told my dad for the first time what had happened to me at the age of 5. It is when I first truly spoke my ugly truth. Did you get any counseling after your parents found out? No. I don’t think my parents knew how to handle the situation at the time. Especially since it had been years before they found out everything that had transpired. I think they saw this bright kid, always full of energy, always smiling, with good grades, and didn’t think it affected me. However, internally it had; counseling could’ve possibly been a great way to release any internal struggles I was dealing with at the time. I don’t blame my parents in any way and do not think they were bad parents. They did the best they could. If you could speak to your younger self today, what would you say? I would tell my 5-year-old self, it’s okay your older self will protect you. I would tell my 7th-grade self, that I am proud of her for speaking up and telling her the truth and that she may have to be her own hero. And I would tell my 16-year-old self, that with trauma there comes healing and it’s coming. When did you start working? I started working at the age of 11, babysitting for my own babysitter. Then at 12, I got my first job as a grocery bagger