IDENTITY OF SELF – Part 2

Last month we talked about how important it is to diversify both your community and a general idea of how to reduce friction in a diverse group on an individual level. Our culture’s obsession with labels comes with some quite dangerous drawbacks, as we are seeing today in politics. In time, not only has it made individual’s opinions easily written off as they were part of “x group”, the individuals becoming less of individuals but pawns of their ideology/group (hence making the group 1’s view pretty valid), but has diminished the greatest advantage having a diverse community which is the diversity of thought and perspective. The fact that we are no longer coming up with effective and efficient solutions today is certainly an indicator that not only our basic competence as a society has gone down but also our individualism has been diminished.

We can talk about the macro solutions all day and accomplish nothing, but I would instead suggest a radical personal action that has got me some weird looks but has been a positive trade-off. Simply reject labels. You are an individual – first and foremost. Why? Because it makes you no longer you, a safer, a part of an overarching identity but less of you, less independent, more of a prisoner of your mind; Less stressed about being wrong and less vulnerable but less effective and more scared to stand for what is right and thus, making you less inclined to learn to what is right.

How? When you get labeling statements such as “but you are X, X loves Y!”, respond to them and yourself ” They may love Y, but I am not myself and not just X.” This often happens to me in folthe lowing format, Friend says, “But you are Russian, how come you don’t drink?” I say something along the lines, “Well, drinking is not a good thing to, begin with, why should I hurt myself for it?” From what I have seen, the expected response is to jokingly say “I am not a very good X”, but that simply reinforces the surrender of individuality even if it is a joke. Instead, take it up a notch and double down on the comedy by adding, for example, in the case of drinking and Russian, “Well then comrade, maybe they are not very good Russians, because in Soviet Russia, Vodka drinks you!” In this way, I think not only do you make fun of the stereotype but also get to redefine what that label is afterward.

At the end of the day, I think what separates an individual from a herd is what they answer to the question of why? Why do they think this way? Why do they believe this thing? Why do they think that? The answers given are what determine who that person is after all. A good person will do that thing because it benefits most people, a lawful person will do it because that is the way it must be done according to the rules. An efficient person does things or says something because it is the easiest way to achieve their goal.

These may seem like basic things but as Lao Tzu says,

“Simplicity, patience, and compassion are the greatest treasures.”